I’ve been pretty straight up about the fact that I’ve spent the majority of my life overweight.
I grew up as a fat kid and turned into an obese adult.
Getting to where I am now took time and I made a lot of mistakes along the way.
But I’m not special.
It was simply a process of trial and error.
I’m not smarter than anyone else that’s trying to lose weight, get fit and be healthy.
I just found a way that’s different to what the world has been selling us for so long. There’s no secrets, no special supplements, no pills and no programmes.
Just a series of healthy habits, that when stacked upon each other formed a new healthy lifestyle. The by-product of this healthier lifestyle has been weight loss, better health and an increased level of fitness.
But crazy shit happens when you lose weight. People look at you differently. Some people treat you differently. They don’t see, or even stop to think about what it might have taken to get to where you are today; the struggles, the failures, the self-doubt, the embarrassment and the shame. They only see the result of all the hard work and they assume you are somehow luckier than they are, that you’re special.
My Mum always told me I was special, but really I’m just an average guy. I work fulltime, come home and cook tea, do the dishes, watch some TV, check Facebook, work on this website and go to bed. Then do it all again the next day.
I’m not a fitness model, I don’t have ridiculous muscle definition, I’m just a normal guy who now has a healthy relationship with food and exercise.
SO WHY AM I TELLING YOU ALL THIS?
Because there’s nothing in what I’ve done to get to where I am today that you or anyone else can’t replicate. I am not special.
We often impose self-limiting beliefs upon ourselves – Geez I can’t believe I said that – basically we convince ourselves we can’t do shit.
It’s that whole fear of failure thing. Ya know?
We tell ourselves that it’s not worth the effort because we’re scared of failing.
We compare ourselves to others and find a million reasons why they could but we can’t. All too frequently we allow ourselves to think, ‘I wish I could but…’ or ‘I could never, I don’t have…’ or ‘that worked for him but it won’t work for me because..’
When you compare yourself to someone else you’re only making a comparison to what you see right in front of you or at the very best what you think you know about them.
I’m not immune to this, hell I spent most of my life thinking this way. I looked at my flatmates eating the same food as me and thought ‘man, I wish I looked like you. How is it that you can eat cake and not put on weight?’ How can we all watch movies and plough through junk food, yet I’m fat and you’re not?! What’s holding me back from losing weight?! It’s not fair!
It’s an incredibly narrow view. It’s not fair to the person you’re comparing yourself to and it’s not fair on you!
The reality is that they aren’t any better than you, they’re not smarter, luckier or blessed. They are simply in a place you haven’t got to yet. Maybe they started their mission before you, maybe they developed a healthier relationship with food and exercise earlier than you have. The point is, they are simply further down the path than you are and because of that their body and mind is processing stuff in a way yours doesn’t. Yet.
I started my mission to health in 2012, that’s four years of slowly but surely optimising my health. Four years of mistakes and four years of learning. I’m still making mistakes and still learning but I get better at it all the time.
I don’t have mystical powers and I’m not special. I’m just four years into a strategy that works.
A healthy lifestyle is a learned skill and like any new skill it’s not acquired overnight – it takes practice, you make mistakes learn from them and move on. As time passes things get easier. Things that were at one point new and challenging become habit, you continue to refine what you’ve learned, continue to build new habits and continue to acquire new skills.
People who achieve great things usually aren’t the most talented. They’re persistent, consistent and strategic. They make a plan and work towards executing it. However long it takes.
I meet a lot of people that read this blog who have experienced some pretty impressive results, they’re X number of months into optimising their own health and that’s amazing! It makes me pretty bloody happy and a little bit proud to know that the stuff I write is making a difference in people’s lives.
However, I meet an equal number of people that like what I write, relate to it but don’t think it can work for them. They’re stuck in that mindset, thinking they can’t do it, comparing themselves to others and making excuses for why they shouldn’t try.
They come up with every possible way it can all go wrong and that makes a handy excuse for why they shouldn’t bother.
If this sounds like you, then I think you should know that the number one thing holding you back is yourself and your ability to convince yourself that you can’t.
But what if…
…WHAT IF YOU CAN?
I’ve made a lot of changes to my life over the past few years.
I got stronger and healthier, I make better food choices and I’m more confident. I started this website to help others, to help you achieve these same things.
Shit, my life is incredibly different to how it was back in 2012.
But I’m not smarter or better than anyone else; I still have the same fears and doubts like everybody else, (What if I fail? What if it doesn’t work? What everybody hates what I write? What if I can’t do it?) but I’ve learned to ask myself one final question:
What if I can?
I’ve made changes to the way I look at other people and instead of asking myself ‘why can’t I be like that?‘ I’ve learned to tell myself, ‘fuck it, if they can do it, I probably can too!‘
Honestly, it sounds pretty cheesy when I write it down but it’s not like we have to say it out loud.
When you catch yourself doubting your ability to do something, or comparing yourself to somebody that’s in a place you want to be, try saying to yourself (in your head) ‘fuck it, I can do that!‘
Then start working towards it, just a little bit every day.
Remember, small changes can add up to massive results over time. And…
There is nothing that I’ve done that you can’t achieve for yourself.